Yesterday was Stephen's four month birthday. Can you believe it?! Sometimes it feels like he was born just a week or two ago, and other days it feels like he should be a year old. I think it seems that way because it's really been since October 19th that we've been dealing with everything. Not a day goes by that I don't think about everything that has happened since that Tuesday morning but it feels as though years have passed and I've aged about five years myself. And sometimes it feels like all those terrible things we went through actually happened to someone else. Because things like this happen to other people, not us. And also because on the surface we have a healthy baby boy; something no one ever thought would happen. It's just so weird to think 5 short months ago we actually picked put a cemetery where Stephen would have been laid to rest had he not survived. It's sickening thinking about it now. But at the moment it seemed like the right thing to do.
Now we find ourselves struggling with much different things. Things that ALL new parents struggle with; getting Stephen to bed, getting him to sleep through the night, figuring out a routine/schedule, and trying to figure out if all this crying is normal or if something is wrong with him. We never read any books and went to any classes so we are learning as we go and trying not to do things that will come back to bite us in the ass. Like getting him so addicted to his pacifier that he can't sleep without it. Oops....we already did that! Ugh.
But all-in-all I think it's been going really well. His health couldn't be better right now and that's what's most important. And now that the weather is getting nicer, we've been able to get outside and get some exercise. Plus, Stephen loves going on walks which makes it even better.
Our goal for next month is to continue to grow and get longer and be cleared by the pulminologist so we can check one more doctor off the list. That would be awesome! And as always ward off any infections and keep his dialysis going as well as it has been.